Lately, the useful part of my days have been filled with homeschooling, trying to keep up with housework (and usually failing, in all honesty), and eating and sleeping constantly to keep baby bean happy.
Blogging went out the window.
In fact, I kinda sorta forgot I had this blog.
Whoops. Sorry guys.
My heart is in a funny place right now. Part of me is super excited about the future, waiting to see how God is going to work things together, and hopeful that His promises will come to be in amazing technicolor beauty. The other part of me is a little….well, bland. Weary. Uninterested in growth. Apathetic. Pathetic, in all honesty. Just give me a comfy chair by a cozy fire and some mind numbing activities, and it would seem “happy”. But it’s not happy. The truth is, that ravenous apathetic part of me isn’t going to be satisfied with just ruining part of my life. It doesn’t play fair. I can’t let it take over-and by that I mean I have to give it all over to my Father. Constantly. Daily. Hourly, lately. I’ve got to press on, to press in-and REST in His love and care. It sounds impossible. But I know that I know that I know, that all things are possible in HIM. So God, take me and change my heart. I want to be soft in your hands, to be made into your image, your instrument. I know you will change my heart. Thanks Abba.