This week this mama of 3 learned something new.
Wait, who am I kidding, mothers are in a never ending learning streak. 😛 Have you heard of a “bleb”? I hadn’t until this week. Let me share.
Now you mothers who have breastfed probably are familiar with our arch enemy, mastitis. I have had occasional bouts with it, mostly since we moved into our home that we are remodeling and I’m almost always in either overdoing mode or sick-on-couch mode. Yep. Going at a steady pace is not my strong point. Learning. Not there yet. But I usually get rid of the mastitis pretty easily all things considered. Until I got a bleb. What’s a bleb? Read on…
So my 11 month old finally got her first tooth 2 weeks ago. There was much rejoicing when that tooth finally came through! Except on the part of mama aka “The-Chew-Toy”. Baby’s poor latch while teething gave me what I now know is a “bleb” or milk blister. Basically skin grows over the milk pore, trapping milk below and causing all sorts of issues. Including….
Mamas are made of tough stuff when it comes to pain….and this hurt. Bad. Sharp pain. For some reason I tried to pretend it was “ok” for 1.5 weeks. I know, in hindsight that sounds really stupid. “Hm, I have this seriously painful welt on my baby feeding station that gets heavy usage 4 times a day. I think I’ll just leave it be and see if it goes away.” I forgot the cardinal rule of mommyhood:
“If mama ain’t taken care of, ain’t nobody taken care of.”
or something like that….
Finally it started developing mastitis symptoms, and I knew that ignoring it was no longer an option. You know how you treat mastitis?
Um, excuse me for laughing so loud in your ear. 3 kids, house in remodeling shambles, and I’m supposed to….rest?? But yes, of course. And well, in a way, I have. Pretty well, with all things considered.
Thankfully I have an awesome husband, and loving family who come help out when I’m desperate. They are understanding when the house is trashed and such. But not everyone has that. And people do fail, even if they are awesome loving amazing peeps.
But God never fails. I forget that. I forget to seek His Presence, His daily rest He has for me. Sometimes that seems like a crazy impossible joke…. “Rest? Soak in His Presence? Meditate on the Word? But I have three days worth of dishes piled up, a teething baby gnawing on me, the dryer is full of wrinkly work shirts… and my husband’s closet has no shirts for tomorrow, it’s 4PM and I have a half bag of frozen french fries, some tortillas, a pack of cheese sticks and some tomatoes, to figure out some sort of “healthy” and tasty dinner out of in my garage kitchen (The real kitchen is in shambles for the remodel), and the three year old has a low grade fever and runny nose and keeps attacking her sister in frustration. Yeah. Rest? Meditation? In what universe??
I don’t know how. I’ll just be open and honest, I’m not sure how a mother is supposed to have a Sabbath rest. Or sick days. Or to seek God in a daily, intimate way. So far this is all I’ve got:
Attitude may not be everything, but it’s huge.
I can choose to be angry, or peaceful. Loving, or lashing out. Selfish, or giving even when I’m just plain done. Even if I’m wiping a poopy bottom or mopping up puke at 2AM I can do so with a Spirit of joy and peace, dwelling in the shelter of the Almighty. Sometimes we try to separate a quiet spirit and every day life, and that’s when it gets messy.
We once watched a youtube of a pastor talking about how he went away on a short retreat to try to hear afresh from God, and have quiet time with Him. He came home disappointed with his time away to his wife who had stayed home to hold down the fort. As they were discussing the events of the week, she said “Well, while I was running the Hoover God spoke to me about some things, would you like to hear them?” And the pastor was floored that his wife was given such a sweet revelation during her every day activities, when HE had set aside special time and got nothing.
This isn’t to say that God doesn’t want us to find time to slip away and spend time alone with Him, but He will meet us where we are, and love us AS we are.
And I am thankful.